Fashion News Friday 5/30

This past week in the world of fashion…

Qatar Dress Code

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/29/qatar-dress-code---how-to-dress-in-the-middle-east

New “decency guidelines” have been published in Qatar for people who are vacationing to the Middle East. The guidelines warn against women wearing clothes “that are too tight, too short or translucent, such as miniskirts or sleeveless dresses”. I understand respecting another area’s culture and religion. I guess I won’t point out the idiocy of being tolerant of intolerance…oh well I guess I just did… I’ll stop myself before I get political because frankly I find the topic boring and a bit contentious, and it has no place in a light-hearted fashion blog. If you would like to discuss it or give your opinion on the issue, you can do so in the comments section. Anyway, as I said, respect for others’ ideals and cultures… blah blah blah, but their guidelines do include a staunch warning for travelers that is not so mildly worded. They state that anyone who “makes any gesture, recites songs, utters indecent phrases, or does any obscene act in or near any public place shall be punished with imprisonment.” Well isn’t that warm and inviting? The producers of Real Housewives should plan one of the infamous trips to Qatar. Can you imagine Brandi Glanville or Tamra Judge in a Middle Eastern prison just for breathing (because in all honesty, if either of these women is breathing, she’s being lewd or cursing)? DRAMA!

Marchesa in London

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/29/marchesa-to-show-spring-summer-2015-collection-at-london-fashion-week

Instead of showing at New York Fashion Week, as they normally do. Marchesa will show its spring/summer 2015 collection at London Fashion Week. Apparently, it’s only a one-time thing, and the brand will be back in New York after that. This one-time show in London happens to be occurring at the same time as the brand’s ten-year anniversary. Congratulations to Marchesa and the beautiful Georgina Chapman. Marchesa has been my favorite fashion label since I first got interested in fashion. Their garments are truly remarkable, and they deserve all of the success and notoriety they have. If you don’t know about the label or their clothes, go check them out. (http://www.marchesa.com)

Students Start Again after Fire

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/28/glasgow-school-of-art-phoenix-bursaries-announced

I had not heard about this. This is truly devastating for these students. Last week a fire at the Glasgow School of Art destroyed years’ worth of many students’ work.  The Scottish government is providing some money to help the students start rebuilding their portfolios. It is unfortunate that the only thing that can be given is money. The true loss here is the loss of the time and life that the students gave to their art that has now been destroyed. There is no telling what great work or even masterpieces were lost due to this unfortunate accident. The positive side is that the article does not report any injuries or deaths due to the fire.

Fashion Reads 5/29

The library is open…

Angelina Jolie

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/546534/angelina-jolie-takes-20-trash-bags-and-fashions-them-into-a-dress-at-maleficent-premiere-see-the-pic

I didn’t read the title of the page before looking at the picture, and immediately I thought of trash bags or latex. Surely Angelina would not allow herself to be dressed by a Project Runway unconventional challenge for a red carpet event associated with this big blockbuster film. Subway is obviously a sponsor as you can see their name on the step-and-repeat behind her. Maybe she took a gown from their new line; at least she didn’t choose the one made completely of lettuce. I also have to ask about the huge, for lack of a better word, puff in the front… Is that absolutely necessary? Is her assistant hiding under there? Do you know how many black condoms could have been made with that extra fabric? I guess Angelina doesn’t care about the spread of venereal disease…

Vanessa Hudgens

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/545766/vanessa-hudgens-is-wearing-a-sack-with-leg-holes-see-her-super-boho-style

When I first looked at the picture, I thought it was a simple bohemian-style dress. Then I scrolled down, and my mouth started sagging as much as her “jumper” (?). What is that?! It looks like she’s wearing a diaper full of “surprises” underneath that…thing. I…I just…I can’t. She has so messed me up that I am typing in stream of consciousness… And notice that she is covering her face and holding her credit card… She either just paid for lip injections at the plastic surgeon or she’s hiding a herpes outbreak (I seem to have STI’s on the brain today. Sorry.).

Pamela Anderson

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/546172/yikes-pamela-anderson-looks-like-a-blonde-bride-of-frankenstein

Oh my! Pamela is looking a fresh fu… um… She seems to be looking quite disheveled. (I had to suppress my vulgar first thought and keep it classy… I can hear you all thinking, “That’s a first,” and in reply I say, “Rude.”) But really, she looks like she was getting busy with someone and forgot to check herself in the mirror afterward. Her hair is an absolute wreck, her dress is coming off at the shoulder, and she’s holding up the bottom of the dress so she can air-dry. But it is Pamela Anderson; what do I expect? 

Trendsday Wednesday 5/28

I’m doing something a little different today. I’ve dabbled in other topics before, but today I’m dedicating the entire blog to another interest of mine, interior design and home décor. Before someone yells at me saying that interior design is not fashion, I’ll placate you by rationalizing my decision. Fashion and trends (after all that’s what Trendsday Wednesday is all about) are not relegated strictly to the realm of clothes. Interior design (and even food) has trends and fashionable elements to it… OK, did you buy it? Even if you didn’t, it’s my blog, and I’ll pretend you did…

So I have a friend who is currently designing and picking out colors and tiles for her and her husband’s house. I’m very jealous of excited for them. It got me thinking, what are the newest trends in interior design, and if I were designing my house would I adopt some of the trends? Honestly, the answer is most likely, “No”. Trends come and go so quickly and home décor is too expensive to keep changing, so I’d probably want to pick something I could live with for a while. But it’s still fun to think about. So here are a few for you to muse over…

Dark Colors

Some interior designers have claimed that what’s big right now is dark and brooding colors. When you paint the walls a dark color, it gives the room a dramatic and moody feeling. If I had a large house, I could easily see myself making the walls of a parlor or lounge a dark gray or even black. I wouldn’t paint them that color; I would use a wallpaper with a geometric print on it. It would set a perfect atmosphere for an intimate party. However, I would never do this in a room where I would be spending a great deal of time. Too much of a dark room for too long would make me a bit depressed, I imagine. Furthermore, dark colored furniture is also a new trend. So many people love white and light colored furniture. But if you have children, pets, a lot of friends, or if you plan on using your furniture at all, you will end up with stains. WHITE SHOWS EVERYTHING! I have seen color of a brand new piece of clothing rub off on white furniture. It’s just a bad idea. Dark furniture, like navy blue, won’t show as much dirt or other foreign substances. In my opinion, the use of dark colors is a great trend, and I think it should stick around for a while.

Interchangeable Accents

I wish I had the money to do this! Unfortunately, slipcovers, rugs, and even pillows can be expensive, but when you think about it, this would be cheaper than changing the complete décor frequently (there I go rationalizing again…). To have the ability to change out many of the accents and accessories with the changing seasons or a change in your mood would be wonderful. This is particularly easy to do when you have a neutral color pallet in the room and your accents, like pillows and rugs, give you the pops of bright color. Switching out the pillows and rugs every few months to a different color gives the feel of a brand new room, and it would still go with the rest of the room’s neutral décor.

Floral Prints

I’m sorry, but this is one thing I don’t want to see come back. I prefer the modern and somewhat minimalist look. Floral prints in interior design are too matronly and old-fashioned for me. As a child, I grew up with a floral pattern on our family sofa. The colors were muted and dark, but it was so busy and had so many flowers, I swear I wanted to start sneezing just from looking at it. And every spring the flowers seemed to multiply. No thank you… floral prints are too traumatic for me. (I feel like I should be reclined on a shrink’s sofa when I say that…)

Fashion Reads 5/27

As I’m sure you all noticed, there was no blog yesterday. That’s because no one left a comment asking me to discuss anything… That’s right; I’m publicly shaming all of you… But on with today’s celebrity shaming.

The library is open…

Julianne Moore

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/543553/julianne-moore-makes-a-dress-out-of-paper-shredding-leftovers

I never thought I’d say, “Look what the cat dragged in,” without idiomatic meaning about a person. Julianne has proven me wrong. That dress looks like something an animal found on the side of the road and brought up to her doorstep. I have an idea! If we roll her down the red carpet, she may produce enough electricity to power whatever event she’s going to. But seriously, who thought it was a good idea to put this on her? I’m in shock that this is Chanel, but I’ll give it a pass since it’s Chanel Couture.

Emily Blunt and Cate Blanchett

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/543639/fashion-face-off-emily-blunt-vs-cate-blanchett-in-men-s-tuxes

These two women make some very attractive men. I can see the contestants of RuPaul’s Drag Race: Drag King Edition already… Emily Blunt, Cate Blanchett, Tilda Swinton, Ellen… Apparently, these two ladies are dressed up to film a watch commercial. The styling team has done an awesome job. But I have to take a moment to point out the genius of whoever took the photo of Cate Blanchett. It’s a perfect single photo photo-essay. She’s taking the walk of shame (while still looking great) with shoes in hand and bowtie untied while her suitor (the guy behind her to the left) looks on in sadness thinking, “She stole my tux and my heart, and I don’t even know her name…” Perfect shot.

Taylor Swift

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/544854/taylor-swift-declares-it-s-boyfriend-season-in-her-shortest-dress-yet-see-the-sexy-pic

Watch out men… According to E!, hunting season has started for Taylor Swift. She must have run out of ideas for song lyrics, and she’s trying to lure in a new muse with the smell of her fish. At least that’s how it appears with a dress that short. Don’t get me wrong. She looks amazing; she definitely has the body and the legs for that kind of dress. I just hope she’s not going to a sushi restaurant; I would fear for her life. The chef may get confused and try to serve Taylor. Country singer sashimi… something tells me it won’t be that fresh… OK, I’ll stop…

Fashion News Friday 5/23

What’s been going on in the world of fashion this week?

Maleficent’s Horns

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/19/sarah-burton-made-maleficents-horns-leather-headdress

So there was some controversy and disagreement on who actually designed and created the iconic piece of the title character’s costume. It was first reported by the movie’s special effects make-up artist that Sarah Burton, creative director for Alexander McQueen, made the headpiece. However, recently Disney contested that claim saying that it was actually Justin Smith, a London milliner, who designed the piece. Angelina Jolie is apparently a big fan of Smith’s work, and she backed up Disney’s claim that he was in fact the creator of the horns. I have obviously not yet seen the film, since it has not yet been released; but from what I have seen of the previews, I imagine it may have a chance at nomination for costumes at next year’s Oscars. If that is the case, they might want to settle who gets credit for this very important piece of the costume soon.

Mick Jagger is Great-Grandfather…and Grandfather?

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/19/mick-jagger-becomes-great-grandfather-assisi-baby-girl

I know this story isn't fashion related, but I had to talk about it... Mick Jagger’s granddaughter, Assisi Jackson, has given birth to a baby girl. But hold the phone…  Assisi’s mother (Jagger’s daughter) has also been pregnant and is due to pop in a few weeks. So this newborn will have an aunt/uncle who is younger than she is… She could possibly graduate high school with her aunt/uncle… Really? I’m sure this is more common than I realize, but it’s still weird to me. Does it seem weird to you? Anyway, I’ve missed the big picture here. This story is a blatant lie. Mick Jagger did not become a great-grandfather. I still believe he died many years ago, and someone just forgot to tell him.

New Ashish Line for Topshop

http://www.vogue.co.uk/news/2014/05/20/ashish-for-topshop-preview-10th-collection

Ashish has unveiled a new collection for the retailer Topshop. I will admit I have never heard of Ashish, but I looked at some of the recent collections, and I would describe many of the designs as punk/grunge/hipster and eclectic, in other words, definitely Topshop style clothes. Apparently, Ashish has an obsession with sequins, but this collection is almost devoid of sequins. In their place are LED lights. The collection is inspired by the idea of a chic hotel. One of the shirts reads “My name is… My room number is…” With the printed messages and the LED lights, the collection seems trashy, but fun trashy. What I mean is, it is the point and the joke of the collection to be tongue-in-cheek and tacky. So for the Topshop demographic, the 20-something going out to the club, it’s a good collection. A 40-something going to pick up her kids in the minivan?... I’m thinking no…

Don't forget to leave comments telling me what topics you'd like me to discuss on Monday's post.

Fashion Reads 5/22

The library is open:

Today I’m giving my opinions on some of the Billboard Music Awards looks.

http://www.billboard.com/photos/6091965/billboard-music-awards-2014-red-carpet-photos?i=500390

Kesha and Nicki Minaj

Has the earth started spinning backward? Have the demons finally been expelled from these two ladies? Why are they dressed normally? Not only do they look like real women, as opposed to the cartoon characters they dressed like before; they look gorgeous! Nicki is wearing Alexander McQueen (RIP). On most other women, this dress may be considered a little more risqué, but we are not used to seeing Nicki dress this conservatively, and I must say she looks amazing. I’ve previously discussed that Kesha is getting her act together. She apparently wants to be taken seriously, and I was afraid it was too late. However, she is obviously still trying, and I would count this look as a success. I think she looks great. In fact, she looks so different than she normally does that I almost didn’t recognize her.

Natasha Bedingfield

I cannot be the only one who did a double take when I saw this. Does anyone else think she looks pregnant in this photo? The top gives the illusion of a baby bump…or maybe I’m just crazy… I don’t get this top. The semi-transparent aspect is quite modern, but the appliqué is old and matronly, almost like something you would see on a bad 80s mom-sweater. I also think she should have worn a white bra instead of a black one. The color contrast is actually distracting. On a side note, I was surprised to see her at the awards. I almost forgot who she was; her songs haven’t seen the Billboard list in a hot minute. She needs a hit like a crack-head.

Carrie Underwood

I think Carrie needs to rethink that color choice; the yellow is making her look a little Hepatitis B. I will say I like the mixture of hard and soft: hard armor-esque metallic overlay and a soft flowing gown underneath. If it were only a different color…

Lucy Hale

We get it; she’s pretty, she’s little, and she’s apparently a liar. I’m guessing A made her wear this dress? I don’t see why anyone would voluntarily wear the combination of these three random colors. To top it of, it’s in lace! Not a good look.

Agree? Disagree? Let me know! And don’t forget to leave me your requests for Monday’s blog. It can be any topic you want me to discuss in fashion, food, or décor.

Trendsday Wednesday 5/21

I’ve discussed E!’s show The Fabulist before. Sadly, their season has ended. However, they have given us a list of top 10 trends of the season. I’ve already discussed and given my opinion on some of them but not all. So this week, I’m filling in the blanks and talking about the trends on the list I have not bitched about yet. The link to the full list is below.

http://www.eonline.com/photos/12356/the-top-10-trends-from-the-fabulist

Sriracha

Some of you may know this as “rooster sauce” since it comes in a bottle with a rooster on it, but the bottle has the word “sriracha”, so that’s what a lot of people in the Western world know it as. It’s basically an Asian chili sauce with garlic. It has been around for quite a while, but apparently recently there has been a surge in popularity. If you remember, during the Lay’s new flavor competition they produced and sold a Sriracha flavored potato chip. I’m sure many of you will disagree with me, but I found it disgusting, and I don’t think it tasted much like the sauce. It tasted like ketchup with extra vinegar and some spice… But I digress… I don’t have a problem with Sriracha having a burst in popularity. It’s tasty. HOWEVER, having said that, I do think it works best with the type of food it was meant for, Asian or even Asia-esque food. I do not understand putting it on a chicken panini. I have seen on a menu a chicken pesto panini served with “Sriracha mayo”. I’m all for adventurous fusion cuisine, but that does not sound appetizing to me. Maybe I don’t love Sriracha as much as others do, but I can’t imagine it tasting good on any other type of food… I was going to ask, “What’s next? Sriracha ice cream?” but I stopped and decided to Google it. Of course it already exits. What was I thinking? What’s your opinion? Would you eat Sriracha ice cream?

Artwork in Fashion

Hold on… “Artwork in Fashion”?... Fashion IS art! Some pieces are wearable art, and some haute couture pieces are pure art and not meant to be worn out in public. A better and more explanatory title for this trend would have been “Painting in Fashion” or something like that where the medium of art is distinguished… OK, I’m stepping off of the soapbox… Sorry about that… I get passionate about weird things sometimes. Anyway, in this case they are referring to the recent trend of making the clothing resemble paintings. Prada exemplified this trend with one of their recent runway shows. I think it’s a great idea. Why not merge different media of art? It has certainly been done before. What do you think music videos are?

Boxed wine

Before you go out and buy Franzia thinking that it’s chic and stylish now, I must warn you that you are making a false assumption. Franzia is still cheap and not very good. I have, however, tried the Black Box Wines. I saw it was in a box, and I immediately judged the person serving it to me. But I must admit, it was quite delicious. So I suggest you try it. I honestly think the only reason this is becoming a “trend” is because of this company. They have shattered the stereotype of boxed wine being cheap and classless. Now if only someone could do that for Tara Reid.

Book Clutches

I don’t know who first came up with this idea, but s/he is a genius. It looks like you’re carrying a book, but it’s actually a clutch! Now even Paris Hilton can appear to be educated as she totes around what appears to be War and Peace. I enjoy classic literature, and whenever you can incorporate it into fashion, you get the thumbs up from me. (Now that I’ve made that blanket statement, someone will prove me wrong.) It’s yet another example of merging to different media of art. The downside is the price. The designer versions I saw online were 1200€! That’s a bit much, but if you are the DIY type The Fabulist gives you a pretty easy way to make your own. See the link below.

http://www.eonline.com/news/521524/diy-book-clutch

Horned Décor

Unless your house is country or log cabin themed, I don’t see a place for horned décor in it. Frankly I think it’s tacky. I don’t want a dead animal or even a dead fake animal hanging on my wall judging me. That’s what friends and mothers are for. 

Fashion Reads 5/20

Before I commence with our daily readings, I would like to take the chance to wish a very happy birthday to one of my best friends, someone who has always and will always be there for me, and someone I love unconditionally because he is a part of my family, Christopher Mallett. You’re older than dirt with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel, but you’re amazing and fabulous. Happy Birthday!!

The library is open…

Rihanna/Ryan Gosling/Jessica Alba

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/539193/rihanna-ryan-gosling-jessica-alba-and-more-celebs-love-their-pajamas-see-their-sleepwear-pics

I realize that the three names I have just listed are an odd amalgamation (I wonder how many people will get a recent TV reference by my use of that word.) of names. Calm down. They’re not having a threesome (like Vicki Gunvalson allegedly did…OK, I’m done with the RHOC references…) or anything like that. But the three of them are offenders of fashion law. I don’t care how comfortable or stylish your pajamas are. You don’t wear them out of the house. The exception for men is if you are Hugh Hefner, and the exception for women is if you work for/live with Hugh Hefner. Otherwise, leave those clothes for lounging in the house or your nocturnal activities.

I must admit, of the three pictured here, I would consider Rihanna’s a jumpsuit, but just barely. So I guess I can give her a pass this time. Ryan Gosling from the waist down looks amazing. I love his shoes. However, it looks like he raided a grandfather’s closet for the top. Jessica Alba gets no mercy. If her hair and makeup weren’t done, I’d swear she literally just rolled out of bed. It’s not even sexy. It’s baggy and, frankly, ugly.

Lupita Nyong’o

http://www.eonline.com/shows/fashion_police/news/539109/lupita-nyong-o-s-netted-met-gala-look-gotta-have-it-or-make-it-stop

Lupita is celebrating Halloween, Saint Patrick’s Day, and National Fishing and Boating Week (Yes, it’s “reel”; I’m just as appalled as you are.) all at the same time. She’s Josephine Baker trying to go fishing on March 17^th and she’s making sure no one can pinch her. If I were her friend, I’d do more than pinch her for wearing this ridiculous bedazzled literal fishnet. I’d love to know how she plans on sitting in this; if she does, one of those rhinestones or fake emeralds will be twelve years a prisoner in her butt.

****SPOILER ALERT****

Bianca Del Rio

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/19/bianca-del-rio-drag-race_n_5353509.html

In honor of this season’s winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race, I’m giving the last spot in today’s blog to Bianca Del Rio. This bitch can read and throw shade like nobody else on this God forsaken planet, and I would love to be able to read her…but I can’t… I loved her gown on last night’s reunion. She posted last night that the floral part of the gown was hand painted by Jeff Fender. I was shocked. That painting work is so beautiful and detailed; I would never have guessed it wasn’t machine made. Congratulations to Bianca. As a fellow south Louisiana native, I was rooting for her. I just have to say, while Courtney Act has a great look, her dress looked like it was made of the cellophane Bianca would wrap her gift baskets in (if she ever gave any… heartless bitch…). Sorry, I had to get that out. Too much positivity starts to melt my icy heart.

Make-a-Request Monday 5/19

Hello everyone!

First, allow me to apologize for my absence over the past few weeks. I’ve missed writing my blog terribly. However, school does come first since I’d like to finish my degree and get a job at some point. How selfish of me, I know. I hope I haven’t lost any readers due to the absence.

I would also like to announce that over the summer I will be blogging 5 days a week. I’m still toying with ideas for a weekly layout, and I value and welcome input and suggestions. Here’s what I have so far:

Make-a-Request Monday: During the week and/or over the weekend you can post a comment in any of the previous week’s posts asking me to discuss my opinion on any fashion-related topic, whether it be about a trend, a celebrity’s look, or even if you should buy a certain clothing item or accessory. Just provide a link, if applicable, and I’ll give you my opinion on the Monday blog post.

Fashion Reads Tuesday: The library will open, and I will read to filth anyone I deem worthy. It may be positive; it may be negative; it may WILL be bitchy and shady. You never always know what to expect.

Trendsday Wednesday: I will discuss my opinions on recent fashion trends.

Fashion Reads Thursday: The library will reopen for another installment of shady and snarky celebrity fashion critiques.

Fashion News Friday: I will discuss interesting stories about designers, models, etc.

On to today’s post…

I got the idea for my Monday posts from a friend. She wanted to know my opinion on two topics, so I figured I’d discuss those two topics today, and ask you guys for suggestions for next Monday’s blog. Leave in the comments below. I understand it’s not very easy posting comments from a smart-phone, so you may want to use a computer.

Seersucker suits:

http://www.gentlemansgazette.com/seersucker-fabric-suits-origins/

For those of you who do not know, Seersucker suits are casual men’s suits that are characterized by the pairing of a white and colored stripe. The typical colors I have seen are light blue and pink, although apparently there are other color options. They are typically lightweight and worn in the summer. If you want to know the history of the suit, you can read about it in the link above.

In my mind, there are two types of stereotypical guys who would wear these suits: a man watching polo in the Hamptons on a summer afternoon or a Southern gentleman in Charleston sipping a mint julep on his veranda. Personally, I have mixed feelings about these suits. From the two men I described above, at least in my mind, it seems that Seersucker suits are linked with money and class. Also, I’ve felt the material; they are definitely comfortable and would keep you cool in the summer heat while, at the same time allowing you to look good.

However, that’s where the positives stop for me. Seersucker suits are also known for their characteristic “puckered” look. That’s the word others have used. I, on the other hand, would use the word “wrinkled”. Why would you want to wear something that looks like it was rolled up into a ball on the floor of your closet? While you look classy, you also look lazy (of if you’re obnoxiously wealthy, it looks like you don’t know how to hire good help that knows how to use an iron). I know from working with this fabric that it is impossible to get it to look crisp. You can steam out the wrinkles, but as soon as you touch the fabric, all of that hard work gets flushed down the proverbial toilet. Also, I left out part of the mental idea of the type of men who wear these suits from my description above. I called them “classy” and “wealthy”, but I left out “douchey” and “arrogant”. I view Seersucker suits as a status symbol, a way to show off wealth. And it’s not that they are very expensive; I just associate this type of suit with old money arrogance, like the Kennedys or other political dynasty. For those reasons, plus the fact that I view them as old-fashioned, I wouldn’t wear a Seersucker suit.

Track pants

http://www.vogue.com/vogue-daily/article/taking-cues-from-fall-2013-track-pants/#1

According to Vogue, track pants were a trend from last year (2013). Designers have tried to take the drab jogging pant and make them fabuluxe. Apparently, even Balenciaga made a track pant; however, something tells me Myrtle Snow would not have worn them… I suppose the idea is to look good at all times, even when exercising. I’m all for that. Just because you’re at the gym or running around the neighborhood, that doesn’t mean you have to look unkempt and unpolished. My only concern is paying a designer price for something you’re going to be sweating in and mistreating. But if you have the money, go for it. Grace Helbig, start saving up your money.